At the time, a broke up, a betrayal, a humiliation, an affront, an ofense, and anything you might be living, might be the only thing you think of. I am not here to tell you to overcome it right away, to forget it and to keep wlaking, that everything is going to be ok or that you should be a good christian and forgive the person now. I mean, don’t get me wrong, those things are true, and they will come, you will feel better and you have to keep walking but… That is not what you want to hear right now and most important, that is not what you should hear now.
What you have to do is cry if you need it, you can yell at the pillow if you want to, you can stay home and watch tv or just sleep while your heart recovers from what you are feeling now. This is not a time to fool yourself and tell yourself everything is ok because your heart is not. And please, again, do not misunderstand me and think I am encouraging depression, no. All I am saying is that for so much time people have dealt with their problems in a wrong way; for example, the so called situation after a breakup, when people go and sleep with the first person they see just to take revenge on their former couples or to tell them they don’t need them, but they are actually still broken inside.
You should not pretend things are fine, you should keep waking up and taking a shower and going to work and smiling, yes, but what you should not do is bury your sadness and let things disappear on their own because when you do that, you are not facing the problem, you are just avoiding it and sooner or later, your unhealed wounds are going to take their toll on you.
Heal, take your time, have dates with yourself, go to coffeeshops and draw, write about it, get a new hobbie… But don’t cover it. Healing, as love, cannot be forced.
Things will get better, they got for me, and at the time, I thought it was going to last for ever.